by Swan » Wed Sep 08, 2010 11:52 pm
Well of course that depends on the organ and the reason for its removal, the degree of difficulty, etc etc...
Here's a rough conversion chart. Same price for removal or transplantation... higher if you're the *donor* for a transplant, of course. Just *double* the dollieh totals.
1 lung: 20 1/6 dolliehs 5 1/4 dolliehs 3 1/3 Dolliehs and put down those cigarettes! Yeesh.
1 Kidney: 20 1/6 dolliehs 5 1/4 dolliehs 3 1/3 Dolliehs. You know you'll only pee on alternate days, now.
1 Ovary: 10 1/6 dolliehs, 3 1/4 dolliehs or 2 1/3 dolliehs Of course the bigger the cyst, the bigger the doll.
BOTH Ovaries: 20 1/6 dolliehs 5 1/4 dolliehs 3 1/3 Dolliehs Those aren't hot flashes, they're Power Surges!
Hysterectomy: 15 1/6 dolliehs 4 1/4 dolliehs 2 1/3 Dolliehs and throw an "It's GONE!" party!
The Whole Shootin' Match (panhysterectomy with Oves) Fuggit. buy the store! Once you can move again!
1 testicle (and you thought I'd forget the guyz!) 10 1/6 dolliehs, 3 1/4 dolliehs or 2 1/3 dolliehs
BOTH of the Guys: Blank check, Doodz! AND my sympathy! Who'd ya piss off?
BOTH lungs: Hell, Chica, you gon' DIE! Send ME all yer dolliehz! Now before you sign that surgical consent.
Heart: (see Both Lungs) I left MINE in San Francisco.
1 Breast: 15 1/6 dolliehs 4 1/4 dolliehs 2 1/3 Dolliehs Use a Gretel head as a prosthesis.
BOTH Boobs: 20 1/6 dolliehs 5 1/4 dolliehs 3 1/3 Dolliehs (Unless it's a Boob Job! TCHEE! Ya coulda bought DOLLZ!
) I hereby nominate you for the Hyatt Boobie Prize. Yes, you know why.
1 Arm and 1 Leg: Fuggedabouddit! That's the going PRICE for some of those lovelies!
Spleen: 15 1/6 dolliehs 4 1/4 dolliehs 2 1/3 Dolliehs. Dish the dirt on how ya busted it, 'K?
Gallbladder: 15 1/6 dolliehs 4 1/4 dolliehs 2 1/3 Dolliehs and watch yer diet, Chica! You not feelin' so hot!
Feel free to add your own calculations... Just remember to send all the extras to Swanage Santa Fe. I'll be waiting.
No do NOT send me the used body parts, 'K? My doctor says I have to cut down.
Swan
"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." -- Arthur C. Clarke, "Profiles of The Future", 1961 (Clarke's third law)