by mygreenpajamas » Sun Oct 23, 2011 8:51 am
it's been my experience that my mom disapproves of everything i do ever. until i moved out. i didn't start getting into bjds until i was 19 and i was already financially independent. i think that the thing with any expensive hobby when you're a kid will throw your parents off though. my mom never bought us anything growing up. well except food, shelter, and the occasional sweets. but if we wanted video games, i had to babysit and my brother had to do yard work. then we could get that $50 game or $200 console. but the bjd hobby is in the hundreds of dollars range. i have a friend whose mom buys his dolls and he doesn't respect or take care of them because he has no understanding of how much they're worth or any responsibility for them.
if you're friend really wants to start collecting, she needs to communicate how serious she is to her family. to show that, she might want to start working hard for extra allowance and help out whenever she can. schmoozing helps. she can cook a fantastic dinner for the fam or do a couple extra chores around the house. or she can wait until she doesn't need their approval.
nowadays, i live with my boyfriend and he's not so sure about the whole doll thing. he says they creep him out and so i have them in my office where he can't see them (or they can't see him...) but he's told me a few times that he doesn't want me to get anymore. i can understand why, they're expensive. but he doesn't understand how much i loves them. so when i get new ones, i have them sent to my mom's house. she thinks they're adorable (she doesn't know how much i spend on them) and then i migrate them over to my office. if there's no huge box opening ceremony, he stays in the dark. win win. hey, you might even have your friend just have her dolls shipped to your house.
i think it's great that you're tying to help your friend. but in the end, it's all up to her. you don't want to do all the work for her or have her family place "blame" on you. that's the kind of thing that breaks up friendships. best of luck to you both though ^_^