by MeltedCaramel » Tue Dec 31, 2013 10:31 pm
Oh, OkamiKodomo, I am so, so very genuinely sorry. I had to have my cat put down last year and it nearly did me in. He was only four years old but he had a congenital heart defect that was untreatable. Still, he was my best friend. I'm not even a cat person (*Stares at the three she owns* I can't say no to animals in need? Even when they pee under my bed?) and this cat was AMAZING. He was my baby instantly. After being caught out in the wild (he came from a feral colony), transported two hours, not knowing human touch, and being dumped in a bathroom with strange giant PEOPLE, a half an hour later he curled up in my lap and went to sleep purring. He never left my side since that moment. He was gorgeous too, with light blue eyes and a white and red coat, people never believed he was a feral stray. When he got sick it was sudden and devastating, but the biggest thing to worry about is your animal's health. My baby was suffering. His heart was three times its normal size and filling his lungs with fluid. I would have paid any amount of money to keep him with me, but sometimes life just dumps a semi-truck on you and you just have ride it out. My consolation was that he was loved and spoiled rotten, and that he knew it. They know you love them, they know you're not throwing them away.
If the worst comes to the worst, just remember how much you love him and that what you're doing is a kindness. It's the hardest kind of kindness in the world because it's the selfless kind, but giving them the dignity of a slow, peaceful drift from their bodies versus watching them suffer until nature decides she's been cruel enough...it becomes a bit easier on the heart then.
I hope everything is alright, and I hope it's just a fatty, fleshy tumour or polyp (my dog had both of these in abundance and lived to the ripe old age of fifteen, which for a pitbull is way over their expected lifespan). As for help with money, call around to different vets and emergency vet places, and call places like PetCo and PetsMart and ask for help, payment plans, anything. The SPCA might be an okay route but they're usually swamped, especially during the holidays. See if you can find a sympathetic vet who will allow a payment plan for any tests/biopsies/etc.
My heart goes out to you Okami, it really does. I am so sorry. It's always heart-wrenching losing an animal, whether its suddenly or that horrible build up where you know it's happening.
Please give your baby a kiss for me, and I hope everything turns out the best it can, whatever has to be done.
"You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it." -Robin Williams