by Mirrin » Thu Jan 24, 2013 6:43 pm
What's happening in my life is potentially a good, albeit stressful, event. I am going to this theatre conference called URTAs in Chicago where you put your portfolio on display for grad schools. They sign up for interviews with you and offer deals to go to their schools, waved tuition, insurance, all sorts of good stuff...
Basically, it's a super big deal. It could be great for me. I am just very, very stressed out about it. I feel like I've been having a panic attack for about two weeks straight.
I was stressed out to begin with. Then my step-mother pretty much told me my chosen career field as well as my undergraduate degree were jokes and I'd not get a dime for grad school from them. I never asked for any assistance. It's the reason why I am going to this conference, something I told them two years ago when I decided that was what I was doing. I made it plenty clear I didn't want their help. I didn't even ask for much help for my undergraduate degree, paying for the vast majority all by myself. She knows I am not trying to get money for school. I have no reason to. She just said this because she wanted to make sure I knew that she thought I was a dumbass for trying to become a college professor for costuming and design. It was strictly to rub it in my face.
It's not like I expect people to understand, but this is a time in my life when I need support. I am straight up panicking about the conference and it made it just that much worse. It's hard to have confidence when people want to see you fail.
At Home: Lettice (RS Rong), Avery (PD Tara), Sebastian (RS Wu), Titiana (RS Li), Patrick (RS Mai), Vivica (DDoll Airi), Brody (DZ Hid), Fyodor (DDoll Hiro), Landon (WD HOE Juwel), Khoshekh (Oleum's Dolls)