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A discovery about my depression

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A discovery about my depression

Postby DollyKim » Sat Jan 31, 2015 6:49 am

It's been over 20 years since I survived a traumatic brain injury which included an initial impact to my frontal lobe above my right eye. Since then my emotions have been a bit scrambled, I haven't felt things as intensely as I did before, and I have had extended periods of disinterest in things like my dolls which are major components of my life.

These can be seen as symptoms of depression, I took them as depression, and got upset with myself that I wasn't "getting better". I have had deeper times of sadness that might have been true depression, life circumstances and other things that would get anyone, and I would go on and start to feel better again, to a point.

Recently I read a book called The Tale of the Dueling Neurosurgeons by Sam Keen and learned my spells of disinterest and scrambled emotions are most likely related to the brain injury. It can improve and has but I can let up on myself when I don't have any rat's asses to give about anything. It's a hardware issue. I feel relieved that in a way there's nothing I "should" be doing to "feel better". It also helps me make sense that I'm going back to things from before the TBI that excited me because I'm wanting to feel that again.

If you are feeling sad, mad, bad about life don't go through it alone. If you feel that you need or want help seek it out. I'm still here because I did.
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Re: A discovery about my depression

Postby Kirahfaye » Sat Jan 31, 2015 12:02 pm

I didn't know you considered that your bouts of depression came from something other than your head trama. I'm glad, though, that you have found some answers so you can handle it with a better perspective.

True clinical depression isn't something a person can just get over, either. Had this been the cause, you could no more have gotten yourself better - without medication(s) - than having it be a neurological issue. No one who experiences depression (or anxiety or any number of mental and neurological disorders) should feel defeated or "wrong" to seek medical assistance to get better. My daughter suffers from clinical depression, severe anxiety, neurological motor tics and Tourettes Syndrome as well as other disorders. We tried to "deal" with it a couple of years ago, but now she sees a neurologist, a therapist and a psychiatric nurse and is training our dog to be her PSD.

You'd think that in today's "enlightened" society, there would no longer be a stigma attached to neurological and psychological disorders. It's improved since the time my sister suffered from biopolar disorder, but there is. It's especially difficult when family members don't understand or flat out refuse to accept it. Often enough, the sufferer places most of the pressure to be "normal" on themselves.

I hope the day will come when the stigma is removed.
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Re: A discovery about my depression

Postby Jobee » Sat Jan 31, 2015 1:48 pm

I'm the luckiest little headcase alive. Half my family's mentally ill somehow, so we all get it. We all support each other, make sure everyone takes their meds everyday, and we're very understanding of each other. That understanding is so crucial that part of how I chose my hubby was the fact that he has his own similar baggage too, and knows how to take care of it, so we can take care of each other.

It's just like diabetes or Crohn's disease, you gotta follow the rules, take care of yourself, and sometimes you need help.
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Re: A discovery about my depression

Postby kenaiqueen » Sun Feb 01, 2015 10:58 pm

Jobee wrote:It's just like diabetes or Crohn's disease, you gotta follow the rules, take care of yourself, and sometimes you need help.


Truth! I haven't needed to take depression meds in a long time, but all I can do for my Meniere's is try to eat well and get plenty of rest & stay hydrated. I pay when I don't eat right.
Just because you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD.
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Re: A discovery about my depression

Postby AlmySidaKay » Mon Feb 02, 2015 9:29 am

DollyKim wrote:It's been over 20 years since I survived a traumatic brain injury which included an initial impact to my frontal lobe above my right eye. Since then my emotions have been a bit scrambled, I haven't felt things as intensely as I did before, and I have had extended periods of disinterest in things like my dolls which are major components of my life.

These can be seen as symptoms of depression, I took them as depression, and got upset with myself that I wasn't "getting better". I have had deeper times of sadness that might have been true depression, life circumstances and other things that would get anyone, and I would go on and start to feel better again, to a point.

Recently I read a book called The Tale of the Dueling Neurosurgeons by Sam Keen and learned my spells of disinterest and scrambled emotions are most likely related to the brain injury. It can improve and has but I can let up on myself when I don't have any rat's asses to give about anything. It's a hardware issue. I feel relieved that in a way there's nothing I "should" be doing to "feel better". It also helps me make sense that I'm going back to things from before the TBI that excited me because I'm wanting to feel that again.

If you are feeling sad, mad, bad about life don't go through it alone. If you feel that you need or want help seek it out. I'm still here because I did.


I had a traumatic brain injury last year that resulted in a sever concussion. My husband says I still act a bit different, trail off some times. Have a lack of interest in things mid-stride. And even have problems communicating my wants to him. I just figured it was all depression talking, but that makes a lot more sense.

On the other hand I did have clinical major recurring depression before the head injury. So... I'm just guessing they probably don't go best together.
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Re: A discovery about my depression

Postby DollyKim » Mon Feb 02, 2015 7:18 pm

It can depend on where the initial hit is and the counter hit is when the brain bounces off the skull because of the Newtonian physics thing. A living brain is squishy and the inside of the skull a bit pointy in places.

Recognizing your challenges is a good step because you can work to try and rewire around them. I've got some stuff I've been working on for years that I'll go back to and finish like I never stopped in the first place. Other stuff, meh. Knowing that I do that makes me weigh each new thing I want to take on more carefully.
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